when I try to hear this in my head my mental voice is incapable of pronouncing it fast enough to fit the timing of the line
“noooo oooone… adjksjfksfjslenry like Gaston!”
and when I try to fit it to one of the longer such lines, my mental voice becomes too confused about conflicting scansion to continue
no one’s droll like gaston no one’s swole like gaston no one fits his assigned gender role like gaston
I’m especially fond of the paaaatriaaarchy
My what a guy that gastooon
Bless you for making it scan
NOW I CAN’T READ IT WITHOUT SINGING IN MY HEAD
No one’s droll like Gaston, No one’s swole like Gaston, No one fits his assigned gender role like Gaston! For there’s no one online half as phony, His tinder’s got dick pics to spare, You can ask any neckbeard or brony They’ll show you (no homo) whose trilby they’d wear! No one drawls like Gaston Or catcalls like Gaston, Or manspreads on the train in a sprawl like Gaston! I’m especially fond of the paaaatriaaarchy! My what a guy that Gastooon!
…I’m not sorry.
never be sorry for this, it is glorious
Oh shit tumblr has a new best post how come no one told me.
Prompt-based fandom events are when you really learn everyone’s colors like you’ll find the people who take the prompt “death” and come up with some smarmy ship-art of character A and character B walking over dead leaves while wearing scarves and drinking hot cider and then you’ll find the people who take the prompt “sunshine” and write how a bright glint of sunshine reflected off the barrel of a gun is the absolute last thing character A sees before taking a bullet to the chest
you can lead a content creator to water but you sure as fuck can’t make him drink
content creators, much like the elder gods, must not be given requests that can be left to interpretation, for the results bring madness upon the unwary
fun fact about fic writers. every time they post anything at all, they slide into one of the circles of hell while they await a response and their brain turns into a endlessly echoing refrain that this time people have seen through the facade, and now know that your writing is pure garbage.
It’s okay. Your desire to write will return. Your desire to do other things you love will come back, too. You’re not weak. You’re just having a hard time right now. Try not to add self-judgment on top of everything else. Depression is hard enough without blaming yourself for it.
We (in the US specifically) live in a productivity-obsessed, emotion-phobic culture which blames individuals for “failing” when they are anything but hyper-productive and relentlessly optimistic. This cultural narrative so pervasive that it’s difficult to see the high standards we set for ourselves for what they really are: Complete and total bullshit.
Despite the rampant cultural garbage that teaches us to interpret emotional ups and downs as an aberration, MANY writers and artists (and people in general!) struggle with depression and other mood “disorders.” It is not uncommon for us, among other things, to go through periods of hyperactivity followed by depressive episodes in which we get very little accomplished. I am not saying you shouldn’t try to alleviate your depression or work to find ways to minimize your suffering in the short or long term. I’m just saying there’s nothing wrong with you, and you aren’t alone.
I’m going to say that again:
If you’re having a hard time writing or enjoying writing right now because you’re depressed, you aren’t alone.
I wish I had some kind of magical answer. I don’t. But I do know that accepting your depression and loving yourself anyway beats the hell out of berating yourself for feeling like this. So, with that in mind, this might be all I have to offer:
I think you’re doing a great job. I’m sorry you feel like shit. I’m on your side whether you’re writing or not; whether you feel good or not; whether you’re being “productive” or not; whether you wanted to get out of bed this morning or not. You’re still a writer to me, even if you’re not writing right now. You don’t have to prove yourself to me or anyone else. I love you, and I hope you feel better soon.
You know what I don’t get? When fanfic authors apologize for long chapters. It’s like? You gave me bonus content, for free, and you’re sorry about it? Bruh. I have already named my firstborn after you. Dude.
You know what else I don’t get? When they apologize for short updates. It’s like: look at these new words I gave you! Sorry I didn’t give you even more free words. Bro, that’s at least two words that I did not have yesterday. For free. Dude. Thank you.
And another thing: when people drop out of nowhere with a surprise update and then apologize for it taking a while. Like, dude, I wasn’t expecting anything, and you gave me words. I thought this fic was abandoned, but wait: there’s more. You just popped in and reminded me that this is a Good Fic that I should probably reread. You made my goshdarn day.
Basically fanfic writers are under no obligation to publish anything so when they do update it’s always a net positive because the story is longer now, and I have something to read, so thank you so much to everyone who writes fic at whatever pace or quantity they want.
this makes me feel better for taking so long on my fic’s update
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